En Duo Grande Finale (2)

As promised, here's the wrapping up of the En Duo-series, with a massive amount of Je t'aime....moi non plus coverversions. I have no idea how many versions there are, this incredible list isn't even complete.
NOTE: ALL JE T'AIME-FILES ARE DOWN!

Instrumental
The melody of the song was appealing to muzakmakers of all trades, like the soft-focus-saxophone of Paul Brooks, the gente synths of Electronic Concept Orchestra, the BBC Concert Orchestra (which is very funny, since the BBC banned the original), Love Spectacular, the groovy Baker Street Philharmonic, Hammond-man Anthony Ventura, the bachelorpad-favourite Ray Conniff, reggae-enthousiasts Dub Syndicate and Popcorn-makers Hot Butter.

Comic
Serge had an odd sense of humour (I mean, listen to Rock Around the Bunker), and you can imagine the uncomfortable giggling of listeners when Serge, Jane (or BB) started panting. French clown André Bourvil made a funny version (very quick after the Serge&Jane-single) with Jacqueline Maillan. German comedian Nessi Tausendschön didn't bother about the lyrics, and went very convincingly to the naughty bits (she sounds a lot like pornstar Traci Lords). Fellow German Dietmar Wieschmeyer on the other hand sounds like he's starting a motorcycle. Then there's the teaming of Je t'aime and Wild Thing by John Otway & Sarah Ross, the Spanish mouse-and-cow-conversation (well, I'm guessing here) of Los Hermanos Calatrava and (I'm guessing again) the Swedish comedian Ga Runt. Italy's Benito Urghu is having the time of his life, but Britains Judge Dread has a nasty surprise. Pet Shop Boys have a computer do the talking. The most hilarious version is by Japanese band Cibo Matto, who clearly have no idea what they are singing about.

Foreign
Thai Beat by Traces! Eastern European melancholy by Ilona Csakova! Italian romance by Ombretta Colli! German industrialism by Einstürzende Neubauten!

Family
These songs either stay close to the original or try to capture the atmosphere of Jane and Serge. It's an educated guess though that whoever sang on flutist Edward Simoni's version, weren't heavy petting while recording. Anita Lane, on the other hand, sounds like she wants to eat Nick Cave right then and there. This English duet is on Mick Harvey's Serge-tribute Pink Elephants. Notice, by the way, that neither this version, or the English-version by Pet Shop Boys, or this 1973 semi-erotic version by Sylvia & Raflin Ralfi Pagan, manages to capture the sentence "je vais et je viens entre tes reins" (I come and I go, between you kidneys). Harvey is part of Nick Cave's Bad Seeds, just as Barry Adamson was, I don't know who's the girl next to Barry. His duet-partner Louise Ness sounds excited. Miss Kittin does to, with dance-partner Sven Väth. Jaël of Swiss band Lunik sounds sweet (duetting with rockers Züri West), but the hottest couple are no other than Placebo-singer Brian Molko and actress/model Asia Argento. Far hotter than the bland version by German punkband Böhse Onkelz.

Ça suffit?

(Mille fleurs á SpikedCandy, Maks and Norbert for helping me out!)